Home Sweet Home

We brought our sweet boy home from the hospital a week ago tomorrow. Isn't that amazing? He was discharged 5 days after open heart surgery! I thought I'd be a nervous wreck bringing him home, but 3 days after surgery, he felt like a completely normal baby to me, and we were all ready to go. He has recovered so quickly and with no complication. We have been blessed beyond measure! I still can't believe it. I told myself numerous times during the hospital stay that as soon as we got home, we'd look back and think how quickly the time flew by at the hospital even though at the time it felt like we were there for years, and it's true, it feels like Benson was just born a week ago and our time at Primaries was only a day or two. I'm glad that it feels that way, but I hope and pray that I never forget the lessons I learned while we were going through this trial in our lives. In Benson's short life, he has aloud me to learn more than I have in my whole life about fear, faith and compassion. But most of all, I have learned that I am stronger than I ever thought I could be, not on my own however, I know now just how much I need the Lord in my everyday life. Not just for the big scary trials in life, but for the small things, like being patient with my kids on days when I feel like crawling into bed and giving up, or for help in recognizing where I need to make improvements in myself. He will always make me a stronger, better person if I rely on him. That is what, more than anything else, I hope I never forget from this experience.
Since we've been home, we've mostly spent the week trying to adjust to life with two kids. I wont lie, it's been rough. Not as hard as I thought it was going to be (I had myself pretty psyched out), but it's definitely been different. I knew when we found out about Benson's condition that when we finally brought him home, he was going to require a lot more time and attention than most newborns, and he has. For the first couple of days we were still trying to manage his pain, so they were filled with lots of crying and struggles to keep him awake long enough to eat enough that he wasn't hungry 30 minutes later. We aren't giving him pain medication anymore and he seems to be doing fine that way, but he is still struggling with eating enough and is still really fussy. We aren't sure why, because it's not pain from the surgery at this point. I think that he might be a colic baby :( He seems to be really gassy. I can pick him at up any given time and get a huge burp out of him. Poor little thing deserves to be so comfortable right now...I feel bad for him. Tomorrow I am going to start cutting things out of my diet that could be hurting him and we will see if it helps.
We had a dr's appointment after we'd been home 2 days and everything still looked really good. They are monitoring his weight gain closely, as it is a good indicator that he is healing well and his heart is functioning properly. He had gained some weight, but I'm not sure how much because Primaries measured in Kg and my pediatrician does it in lbs. I could do the conversion, but I don't remember how many Kg's he was when we left (oops). He was 7 lbs 11 oz on Wednesday, and we have another appointment tomorrow to check again. He is also getting circumcised tomorrow :( I hate that he has to get that done. I just don't want to put him through anything else, but my Dr. said it's better to do it now than to wait. Wish us luck with that...I'm sure we are in for another fussy few days, but we can do it. Who needs sleep anyway?
Josh has been so sweet with Benson. He loves to talk to him and does it in the sweetest, high pitched voice. It makes me laugh every time. I'm sure he's trying to mimic the way I talk to him. The first day we were home I had given Josh his snack and walked into the kitchen for a second, when I turn back around Benson had a pretzel hanging out of his mouth. So we had to learn that babies only drink milk. Josh also loves to "pound it" with Benson and does it probably 100 times a day. It's super cute. There has been a few come-aparts on Josh's end however, especially when Beau hasn't been around to help give him attention when I'm taking care of Benson. He has yelled at me to "Put Benson down!" a couple of times and always wants to sit on my lap while I'm nursing. But he is adjusting, and it's good for him to learn these lessons. He hasn't taken it out on Benson though, which I'm grateful for. For the most part, Josh is doing really well, and I'm happy to have him around for comic relief. He's so stink'n funny!
Although there have been some rough adjusting moments during this week, I am just so happy to be home with a healthy baby, and to have my family back together again. Every day gets easier as Benson is getting stronger. Soon enough life with be back to normal. Well...a new normal I guess.
Here are a few pictures from this past week.

Going home! First time holding him cord-free.

Josh talking to Benson in his sweet voice, and sharing his blanket.

So cute.

I was holding Benson the other night while Taleesa and I watched a movie and looked down to see him doing this with his hands! How did he do that? That takes skill! We all laughed about it for a while.

Josh, Evan and Benson

Pound it! Josh is making Benson's hand into a fist.

Sweet baby Benson. I love those lips.